Thursday, 28 November 2013

tea house

thank-you so much

absolutely amazing place

have a coffee

and I'll stay here with tea

yes I'll phone you

when I'm somewhere else

please take my picture before you go

yes and put me on speaker

in the space I've left

and we'll talk French

till I meet you somewhere new

and have nothing left to say

Friday, 22 November 2013

# 1

Your bedroom light cuts through my window

burning always


light cuts through


your bedroom light


through my window


your bedroom light cuts through my window


cuts through


through my window

# 2

Pattern of obsession

obsession pattern

of destruction


destructive pattern



pattern of

destructive obsession

pattern of obsession

obsession pattern

pattern closed

start counting


Monday, 11 November 2013

Safety veil

The half moon

and a pair of white doves

can be seen together

if I angle myself right

they strongly advise me

to be positive

and even if

magic and hope

are only words

used in stories

the moon and doves

will shine in the sky again


Wednesday, 6 November 2013

Ten thirty

meeting with rock airy crisis not yet she needs to re-invent her entire self before she'll show him eye rain and lip fruit and drink some crushed poison to broadcast the verse she thinks to her mirror every night she's in debt to the tollgate of desire and polishes her hands clear so he won't feel the confession of the moon coin dropped in the sea but not for her.

Tuesday, 15 October 2013

Cruise night

Ooh Cortina

seat cover 1

seat cover 2

seat cover 3

she's robotic

made up


aviator style



ooh Cortina

lucky car key

she's the prize

no strings


zero 6

electro thrills

lights ahead

high class


1 over

speed limit

ooh Cortina

drivin' Cindy


to the stars


Thursday, 3 October 2013

Getting the most from jobcentre plus

Take a seat and you'll be called. The seat starts to crawl when I hear a man getting barked at for not writing enough in his job search diary I'm next and every time I've done something wrong and it's my fault that I'm here

we are to blame

and hold the door when we leave say thank you and smile straight at dull eyes knowing I'm next to explain what I can do and justify myself because whatever I say we still get knocked down with why aren't you using the universal jobmatch site when they know as well as we do it doesn't work so what do I say yes I'm on it for 3 hours a day you can check I gave you permission wasn't allowed to refuse

I'm to blame

I can't attend because I have an appointment for treatment you look very calm she says it's in my power to stop your benefits if you won't attend I wasn't calm I was frozen with fear and using all my control not to scream I haven't done so well this week can't play this part and she traps me harder with a slow blink and constant discreet bullying before pointing out another defect in my CV she finds another one every time so I have to discard and print out more until the anxiety was so severe something broke

I was to blame

when I said I was going to do work experience in a day centre for the homeless I was told off like a kid and if I done any voluntary work she would arrange it for me the way she was only doing her job chipped away any confidence I had left in other situations I can stand up for myself but in there you just have to sit there and take it until they say sign on the line and I go for another guilty pint with a friend who tells me he's on the waiting list for mental health care when before we'd laugh another tells me he does supermarket shift work so he doesn't have to go back there and hugs me we're thankful for charity shops as we have barely enough money to live on but are in the wrong again if we volunteer to help in one because that time should be spent looking for work

we are to blame

under suspicion and in 2 weeks time know we have to go back for more humiliation like all the other adult humans a statistic of redundancy now a figure to reduce set up with your own failed business or ploughed onto the sick and all you're obligated to do to stay on it before they decide you're not their definition of ill or pushed into jobs where the demands are illegal for the sake of the numbers of unemployed looking lower I hear a young woman verbally slapped for not applying for a job that wouldn't even pay enough for childcare let alone provide for herself and her daughter

we are to blame

the Samaritans are so busy these days he could only leave a message and trains are delayed because another person has jumped in Croydon she tells me the doctor has put her on more pills and looks into her drink I shouldn't you know but it helps me sleep another wakes up crying every day and can't leave her flat after it took a year of appeals and reduced benefits for them to acknowledge she is too ill to work and they will continue her sick pay tribunal cancelled doctors look blank and refer us from one to the other for nervous conditions

we are to blame

I want a job but he asks why I'm not available for work from 9am-8pm every day I tell him I have documentation of my illness he asks if it has a name no I say but I can show you my therapists report he says it's not necessary for him to see it and next time my session will last an hour

I am to blame

and wonder why I always feel in danger have panic attacks and tell people I've just met I'm scared of heights and don't know how to swim.

Can we change the subject please

it's the height of

Rising Sun

Hammer and Sickle

Union Jack

Stars and Stripes

Modern Life

it's the Fashion Baby

Glossy Magazine read it

Monday, 30 September 2013

Carbon copy superhero

When the powers

re-build the city

delays are ammunition

progress reports

go on repeat dead end

timer switch no access

deceiving measures

and man-trap vandals

bleach out before

careless talk

shows up

Wednesday, 25 September 2013

Is Anyone Counting

Is anyone counting

railway suicides

stations of waiting

watching threatening

alarms everywhere

pushing us under

oncoming traffic

all they do is

give us fear of bridges

and say we are the threat

killing us

is anyone listening

for desperation

our desperation

someone unseen screaming

is anyone counting

railway suicides

is anyone listening

no more silence


Wednesday, 18 September 2013


moving staircase goes on forever

leaning towers

at her shoulder

climb out the night bag

now abandon

faze out

and pick up half a clue

in sight of

stripy doubts


come and collect us

with one of him

she took my hand

door of death

dressed better for holding

mauve dyed beetles

give laugh nets for birthday

we saved for years

read the codes

hiding our best

ripe wish

turn over for

mouth to eye close

he had steaks

and cloudy reasons

to hurry home

so mask me safe

and seal the past

tied in knots inside

green bottles dated

don't fall before

early morning

spring loaded honesty

clenched on denial


Thursday, 12 September 2013

The Truth Society

He wants orange juice

not passion fruit

just orange juice

and stands at the front

she shoves

her knickers in a glass

before she starts her dance

today they're fast

on and off and on

the business

she shaved the minutes

it's a race

to finish my drink

before I'm out of coins

I drink too fast

use the stairs

he stands in front of me

I step one step left

leave the wall

to see

the girls are fleshier today

mixed race English

and smile a smile that says

I know what you're thinking

even me the only woman

who chanced it

crossing between black cabs

she shouts something from the stage

to the girl up next

the lights change and I eat

in a sushi bar

there's a bubble on the sauce bottle

out of practice with chopsticks

sesame oil

drips from my lips

next door is




basement and vaults

latex wear





Monday, 2 September 2013


makers of slight mischief

ladder back man

low flying

reach up and take a rib

stealth cruiser

and stir me to

catch taxi love boy

am I able

to take a part

fine order

and set tangle

cradle limbs

safe as words

stuck in the web

fatal no hit land

I am waiting

to be eaten

or myself

loose cross

Thursday, 29 August 2013

2 days

On the under cliff

a blind man


to comb his hair

in a dogs width

of shade

she shapes to please

for early closing

by this hour of August

hover flys confront evening

and flowers look hungover


Under the sail

she's a confection

in naked light

taste of jasmine petals

closer to aroma

and neighbour to ice

I thought you were

a tourist

until you spoke

a hint of chocolate

walking slowly alone


Monday, 26 August 2013


I can hear an alarm clock in another flat 10am no sound proofing she's gone already or can't move to stop the bleep gull head half wing by the communal waste house alarm attention night shift some sort of need for a new invention ex-socialite pulled down from the inside I can hear she is there to answer the phone massing in a silent Thursday morning up beat euro voice from I don't know where we are so lucky and beat desperate by another night of my worth left demented gave itself away now there's something hard stuck between these pages every so often a word messes up but I can't find and wake up too soon to remember sleeping in so can I dress up today in whatever cartoon personality looks least guilty which colour won't cut recovery time then I'll brew some tea coffee if I had some just to make the place smell nice what you do when no one's looking and feed me so I know this is home if I go somewhere everything will be alright good luck charm in next doors yard for sailors love your uniform anyway what about crossing the road or something to say when all the windows round here have reflective glass looking at me looking out checking my hair by crystals hanging from the good luck charm caught the sun if the sun's out tomorrow I might stand to look only if we get some sleep tonight take me flying every other day take me wasting every other day take me fucking every other day take me nothing every other day take me dreaming someone upstairs is dragging pavement across my face and even if I allowed myself a drink of water it wouldn't be wet enough to break down what I've slept like I've been awake all night waiting for results of day waiting room takes all the breath I'm only meat on a bed where the ice melted hours ago posing for a dead artist who can't make me famous now night doesn't get as dark as it used to all week the acting never slows down or is stop too much for now trapped in plans who might if nine roads if they and I if I feel like tomorrow I could break through the earth different as far as anyone can see fed and wise from my colossal unconscious inside louder twisting my belly around machine thunder outside in my mind the vision of a new gull wing or the remains of a fight between angels dressed up disguised as one evil more potent than the other to poison big lurid replay movie action distracted every day waiting for the change by arsenic purge destructive emotion intoxicated I once saw these houses as benevolent mammals jaws open for stray wing clamped echoey panic unwound all over the floor shiny in I want you to show me praise light carefully arranged ornamental interrogation shade cracked on the bookcase tell me what you mean it's too bright yes the flowers are pretty but why do I have to face glare lamp to me they're angel wings coz angels don't exist so I imagine I imagined the whole thing a victim of spontaneous human inertia and make plans to move somewhere else as someone else arrival time unknown depends on the dressing up box or if I'm ready to go in the right shop rain has made the earth soft and the sun's out everyone needs some sun dazed and pinned down like a lab rat even animals look haunted by the truth I apologise for living in this tunnel of fahrenheit extremes and blame the house a grudge against rental décor hiding cuts of quiet television interference showing a failed picture sound of tonight when I stand by the only window I open incidentally the most difficult to reach and question if I might be sucked into grainy black and white speed rushing rectangle and convex I thought about it too much to notice how much peace in the night after wherever I go someone will find out there are people who sleep mutant dreams


Thursday, 22 August 2013

Cage on a hook

Don't move or I'll

break both your legs

phantom steps

in a circle

to the projection room


1920's 1960's 1980's

though it's arguable

I really was only dancing

but running out

tired out

of scarlet

I don't cost much

couldn't see why

sun crush remains

keep going

there are laws of

how much more

vertigo games

and power cuts


tendency to bleed

shadow feeder


Monday, 19 August 2013


we'll be loud

do you mind

drowns out

the three who've

chanted from the start

of a slow walk

to the drill

white and surrounded

by guards

our side of

the fence

a dog urgently

runs with a stick

and a girl

younger than she looks

catches her brother

before he fell

Friday, 2 August 2013

Been Farrened

Outlaw cat man

space prowler

tail high

shoots his star gun

for Bardot eyes

she wears shades

shot of Jack

capital leather letters

from the boot up

claws on guard

flying spurs

left a scratch tag

gate swung easy

departure lounge

don't wanna dodge under

scene watch

kick the last one over

he said speak like the beat

a can rolling

down the street

he's out of our time

out for the night

cat spin

the wheel show

firework keeper

a bite for my pretty

I could drink you up


bold type



the cats whisker

studded silver

cat's gone bird

from big city launch pad

he took a tongue full of fire

in one

Tuesday, 30 July 2013

Heat Spell

Owling out Oliver
steam anchor down
cruciform fizz cup
this needs a torch
wear a crown Jonny
shearing the corona
cross thee over
sham key nails
on a mannequin lever
rag moth
bones need a coat
Ethel snake
a round of dice
caught on Broxa
rocksy dolls house
clockwise and
arrow oil
grey fader
racing blues
lost your mood
out board trash
parallel jumpstart
trap the felon heart
and I've dropped a stitch
are you piranha
are you karma
are you flying ant day
thunder wings
and secrets come undone
fever shock like
Scorpio armour
foil I think
of armagnac blisters
truly flame out
glove ice hand
waxy slip tied
soul dust
Nero fan track
some empire
wake up Annis
pan burn
catty lusion
tear refinery
claw snaring
trenchy resister
crimson seen staring
stay in one place
love rust alley
I know you're there
anaemic injection
correction box 


Monday, 15 July 2013

down the well

going on a move lots of pockets in a jacket army surplus for note books numbers sums in my head sense of direction never could do that road works and palm trees in the atrium he doesn't travel anymore windows without the lift and pull open but I can't stay in one town even if they call it a city and why would you want to leave our trains had doors that would fly open hundreds of mph then she wouldn't be able to get out stuck left it too late and going somewhere she didn't want to beyond the ticket first year in danger car with steel rule stanley strangle wire sits on her own thinking of all the damage she'll have time for if the opportunity made himself known mother didn't worry she knew I carried a knife estates drawn on the side of a roman road bus stops are really loud up north people really do have television voices or nothing's stopped there for weeks and the end of the queue is where the last person wants to go lucky for them this place isn't very good and it's home and has been for generations guide books never say that and looks so nice in the picture can I have a return please no we haven't cracked our skulls timetable gospels over the tannoy reverse at five which one of us is least likely to get searched boot lace undone captain why haven't you got a ticket to be honest I couldn't face getting off at my station so I'm here I see just pay at the window train jam five stacked up evening into night she can see home and hungry summer night looting rush hour freeze outside hours before anything moved not everyone had a seat office girls in high heels got down on the track and started walking guards shouted get back in that's too dangerous all that time breathing in body heat and the windows let too much from out in doors don't open till we stop at a station he lived closest got a bus east us four finding our stop heat drunk and london that time is so silent a grassy area with a swing and sand pit tower blocks and business anything natural living here keeps it to themselves he knows he's lived here for years gritty urban concrete beach do you two know where you're going get a train with me no we know we're enjoying the scenery we know the way we might be later station gates locked left hanging about outside taxi drivers get ready for I just want to get home don't care how much waiting room's locked and the drinks worn off you better get off the cleaners are female and might think you're drunk if I'm not drunk why else would I be here lean into the bend and hope there's no ice four of us got home just keep her walking we will know once I see the river or not actually notice it until bridges day light he got there road blocks people filming from windows record the event action fires don't get out they're in hoods throwing bricks they're kids this is a passenger announcement you'll get killed we couldn't hear it from a night bus south I was just walking and someone shouted out of a car what you wearing I'd been feeling the weight of false legs very old two hundred and fifty the set cross over on the blind corner she sang as she walked home in a new place for company emergency things or a long time ago with her best mate further from the station soaked and mascara runs knew that road well found my way in fog and shoe pinch her favourite songs we knew all the words I sang them on my own but didn't own up upstart start up build up drink up west again friday night capital card to tottenham court staircase looks like it's been under water if we had a shopping trolley we'd get her home quicker then bash something metal on every lamp post as I got into my road and vow to only ever work somewhere on foot you're right it's the same suitcase wheels and duffle bag all those new towns look temporary boxes of cubic metres and multi picture houses we'd get in cars often hired to visit roundabouts she goes into town to get out again spokes of a wheel steering was my main problem shame lockers are in the past some things you just don't want to carry around information update construction some with lights showing off how high they are if you lived here you'd be home by now yes I would is the door locked you got your key I've forgotten my book so I have to think about where I'm going and the rocker who looks fearless and sat in first class she wonders what it's like to walk through those fields rather than stand and hang on to a chair back when tracks collide and wheels conflict hitch hiker as one foot creeps towards the other I'll take up no more space than I have to

Friday, 12 July 2013

Kings Cross

If you are in doubt

café pop radio

is the same in the sun

I am distracted

and over brew

our car's been stolen

a kid shouts

advance warning

major works

delays expected

do you want something



arrival on time

she changes the music

and lets them drop

wonder what they done

between girls

before phones

on the big screen

horses on the final furlong

platform bedroom


open back




gets busy when there's


leopard squeeze of pink

from another world

a police car wails

five feet from

the fire door

thank-you for your


covers herself

a stripper and a man

high five

and always carry

water when you travel


Monday, 1 July 2013

Map Seventy One

White morning

line frenzy wait

one has to be right


while I look up

time the meaning


no, it's alright I'm

just I couldn't hear you

the connection was mud

and the air

fast line

the air had corners


that was breathing mine

I wasn't

time had stuck doors


thought you weren't there

and you

can I trust embery sky

one sky cut line

could be the way out

stretch so I fall

wavy through

wrought iron railings

and mossy jags

pretending Berlin

on the hour unpredictable

solitary heart down first

crocodile spray on hide

cellophane siren

and gouged out sea view

of a bomb site idol

doing spider

and sword words

with arum lilies

every sword of his melted

in tyranny design

every tone of violet

bruise a mattress landing

I didn't ask for colours

if I could only

sleep till winter

and write everything down

make up a name

any page for you

you can have a murder invite

or invent a missing person

any leafy number

of frost burn and sun bite

from dreaming Gemini gardens

a misunderstanding

we're lost

I allowed an impostor

when I opened to say

now he's at the window

telling me what to think

so nothing is fixed


yes, but not in this order


Saturday, 22 June 2013

Evening Slant

Blacker mask jackdaw

on the station bridge

eyes me close

tilt head and still

hops one eighty

eyes me with the other

approval of velvet

and fake Whitby bead

barely a flight

to the rail

showing tail

I give no threat

only compliment

plume and stance

loud enough to make

a passer look

he makes for greater backdrop

the sky

crest of a roof


day heavy travellers rush

birds rule

Thursday, 13 June 2013

Boy cut

She's bleeding out the edges
can you come over
sleep over nurse
I can't go out
nothing clean
pour it for me
hi-contrast babe
working out the frame
in her bedroom
sweat race sigh together
don't care who hears
femme connection
stop for a breath of
off the lead
outside in check pyjamas
and hoody
one eye behind the fringe
plays with her drawstring
Germanic and
her semi-Asian
half drawn eyes
wearing boxy T-shirt
first thing she found
stays by the kitchen door

Sunday, 9 June 2013

PM Stripes

Two boys and pop radio
in next doors yard
good fit
sun lovers
in trunks and
a ready made tan
sculpting for bronze
soul diva
singing them out
on king size
bleach white
beach towel
trainers and flip flops off
legs around
and feet crossed
in the small
of his back
respectable volume
down on square slabs
a hand stroking
his inner thigh
word on the deckchair's
face hidden
by the wall
of yellow roses
kissed by degrees

Thursday, 6 June 2013

High light

Marcasite under

opal glaze

flutter book flick

gas light



dare you

over the roadside

platinum print

she's young

she's not this year

an escaped antique

mirror splash

on a leaf

reflected on sky

opens wing outline

downy lift

triangle trickle

ring ting

out the open corner

bell drop


alight on the

kimono sleeve

last of May

first of June

Saturday, 1 June 2013


My hand resting

on the plastic handle

remember I'm breakable

walk slowly

they went out in

bad rain

to tidy the flowers

I stood up vases

on a fine day

on graves I never knew

not quite believing

someone could hear me

through the clouds

and I could feel

the sun

it's not so much the death

it's the pain that comes before

icy needles

hardly a thing between

leather and bone

yesterday there were bare branches

but how quickly leaves grow

on the climbing rose

so I press my hands

against a cemetery tree

and it's the earth I feel

when she didn't phone I thought

something must have happened

but that's just like her

didn't want to spoil my day

all the words

rush to come out at once

stamp and get stuck

while I hear her

and breathe

Wednesday, 29 May 2013


If I really look

and move to where

the curtain's darkest

I can still see steam

rising from my tea

in the mug I stole

from a restaurant yesterday

I like the handle

it fits my hand perfectly

we left a tip

we didn't realise

service had been

added already

Monday, 27 May 2013

Lightning Gun

An electric shock lady

with an octopus fantasy

deep sea voltage mistress

in a rented apartment

selling shocks to feed the meter

Saturday, 18 May 2013

18th May 1827

Maria stay at home

I heard five rooks calling

black against the sun

William waits to

make a grave for

the molecatcher's daughter

and red will creep

through the barn.

Friday, 17 May 2013

Drum Practice

If I could only

walk on grass

and wait here

for the next bell

and lose count

you were easy

to find this year

Lena a beloved sister

here I am again

digging graves

in the heat the ground is



when it rains

invisible crows

I felt my shoulder

strap slip down

velvety leaf

guilty of treading on daisies

Thursday of French keys

heavy with age

hang about me

and a plastic skull ring

the sound they make

in a tea-room

three volumes of

ghost stories in one

for a pound

I overheard

his cock looked like

some sort of growth


bone china

what could I do?




Thursday, 16 May 2013

Brown or white


café after our


he kept his coat


let's stay I like

the music

from the past

Americans doing English


clowning in the mirror

and do you do

breakfast 3pm

extra bacon please

good cake

is he here

I haven't been paid

romanticising I imagine

he's a dealer

show him out the


sure to give me

a hangover


Saturday, 11 May 2013

Susan carves her arm for dinner

Eat more eat more eat more
eat less eat less
eat more or less what you want
eat more don't eat that
eat less   e a t   l e s s
eat more
eat more
eat more
don't eat that don't eat that
eat less eat more or less what you want
eat more eat more eat more EAT MORE
EAT LESS eat more or less what you want
e a t   m o r e   don't eat that
eat less
don't eat that EAT MORE   e a t   m o r e
eat more or less what you want
eat less eat less eat less eat less
eat more DON'T EAT THAT
eat more EAT MORE   e a t   l e s s
eat more or less what you want
eat more
eat less
e a t   m o r e
eat more or less what you want
d o n ' t   e a t   t h a t
eat more eat more EAT MORE
eat less

Friday, 10 May 2013

Slow moving queue

at the printers
ah, you're still here
a Japanese girl


came to meet her boyfriend
he in a conservative navy blazer
without sleeves


she in a black coat
asymmetric details and
a cloche hat


they waited correctly


Sunday, 5 May 2013

This is a junkshop

when you highlight the leaf
on the inside edge
it changes direction
an inspiration
for a gallery attendants
polka dot head square
so unboot yourselves
for the new dance craze
we call it
the drain
now I've heard reports
of a girl in a secure
since she spoke
to flowers and birds

the aftermath
line is on the turn
where we only have
quite steep hills, no mountains
for a party not in here she's not

all you people get out
can't you see and hurry up
this isn't Canada
and I'm waving a stick
for curfew we electric telepathy

playing our keys
at last
for the red haired singer
who freed a bird
from a shoe

makes it better to give
than receive
though that does depend
on what magazines you read

to bluetonic
and a mod from Woking
I name this ship
a passionate kiss
you and me were walking
along the seafront but
huge and simple
sea beach railings pavement
day last night   

let me believe in ghosts
so when I see him
I'm ready to say hi
seagulls see the funny side
of everything
wouldn't you if you could
fly without trying?  

Saturday, 4 May 2013

Land Slide

It's like standing at the side

of the road

at a crossing

I can hear the crowd coming

but they haven't seen me

some are three joined together

giant and having a great time

growing more mouths

human telephone networks

two are talking

but in opposite languages

multiplying the closer they get

someone shouts skinny bitch

a woman says she knows

who I am

and wonders if I've seen

the posters all over town

saying I'm a fake and a fraud

they're loud as the traffic now

I shrink to keep myself

on the curb

they have concrete necks

and glued in eyes

and I watch as they

push me under the wheels

Wednesday, 1 May 2013

A Clean Pair

Not quite lights out

blue sparkler

under the machine

she devoured them

and used to sit

on the old spinner

lino rippler

oh, to live in luxury

or bang on the formica

from under

the bearings gone

when I was seventeen

I counted seventy one

tanga style

but only wore

ten the same colour

cheap sold in fives and


to chop up sixty one

for dusters

and mock the wife

who irons underwear

Sunday, 21 April 2013

Wild Nerves Live

Splitting the Atom XIV - 7th April 2013 - Brighton
Filmed by Geoff Cheesemaster.                                                                                                                                                                   

Thursday, 18 April 2013

Eiwen changed her image

back in Essex where people

were run over by lorries

and survived

young enough

for a statement wheelchair

crop and steel

to scare the natives

out of, 'what happened to you?'

she'd answer with one word



I dream of living in

a red brick house

that won't rattle in the wind

in a street where people only go

if they live there

no risk of

unexploded bombs under foot


nothing lets in the cold

like a broken bone

your scarf wrapped round my foot

while we waited in casualty

hungry and distracting myself

with my hair needs washing

wanting more than love walks with

seagull shadows on the pavement

holding still our Sunday

inside your blue wool scarf

Sunday, 14 April 2013

Tight Thin Wedge


It takes half an hour to get anywhere

here blood's the choice proof of size

for target practice

for target practice

fear has an image

one hundred forgottens slide

out the frame

try and ignore her

blaming the moon

for being that brilliant

such a responsibility

of first steps in a dance

on the fault line

on the fault line

we had tails then

holding hands twin-anemone

I'll lead and let go

kiss you goodbye and drop

stringy meat you've never

felt a thing

did you follow me in look

something animal shape

low before I turn around

and saw the dainty shoes

on a prosthetic limb girl

neat meccano through St. Pancras

ballet slipper bow

bolted through the foot to rooms

where the drains are up again

good news would be

if man saw an island

if man saw an island

turned round

and never went back

believing what I read on toilet walls

rehearsals for war

rehearsals for war

like out on Foulness Island

authorised personnel in regulation overalls

chart explosions safely in their place

fog down on visitor day

they photographed us

for the future

for the future

play me a dirge

pain-killer generation

that's a dead poem


of a thin chronic screech

break the glamour curse

shouting cold

shouting cold

bricked in with an audience

till we go home in stages

and I crave nostalgic comfort

from the elegant woman

who plugs the kitchen sink

her dance card full of lime scale

feeling the cliff edge in a playground

my scream unfinished

in the delivery room screaming's permitted


fifteen before midnight

hose clean the air

twin across the table

given permission to leave early

in the dark

in the dark

I tasted something you left me

some fish fire ink

in fear

Wednesday, 27 March 2013

Waste Land


Walking a tight line to the plaster room my foot bone broke when I fell four days down a sink hole in my imagination. We're all the colour of mushroom aping sleep and motion sickness for thrills from drum taste of dub, look out there's a crash coming in. Late. She died drinking from a crack in the cup. I've heard that's something people say, I believe it's so feeling warmer now you've come home. Blood on the wall, 'looks like blood,' the police medic said and was sorry for the time we should be asleep and young girls please gash nail varnish only in rage. Size is deceptive. Two social lives worked together lead to ruin. The solution would be to buy a pack of four biros not one at a time, illogical position in a meaningless universe, says that in my dictionary…accept it a gift, eleven year old me for help with my homework. Swollen by the past. Reaction to earrings from my old work the way they take it so seriously I think it bigger just doing their job a fraction of my day and I of theirs, go home and forget who'd live in a flat? Pulsing with poltergeist activity same night as the fight his turntable tilted but a nudge behind a wall of books also his and two bowls, mine, reversed, this can't be blamed on a cat. Adrenalin trap. Another day lame researching internal fungal growth. Everything on my plate I suppose I should eat. Everyone's different one fig skin later I was shitting all night. No one told him, swallowed it whole for years. If I wash up now the tape will still be running when he gets home from work and look like I've done more than knitting bone, four weeks till a sticky join speed of an ex-fingernail. Sorry T.S. I lie down in the dark with four sides of you but kept getting up to turn on the light and write something down and now you've finished a bird in spring sounds angry. She thought I should listen to her.